I became vegan to live
Updated: Jan 23, 2022
Back in 90’s I began to question the foods I was eating. As a teen I was happy to have the emergence of fast food on the high school campus. I followed my parents to one of their many “meetings” like weight watchers etc. And I’d witness how long that would last. Not nearly long enough and best I knew I was happy to be back eating tasty foods and frequenting restaurants and buffets. After high school, I attended a nutrition class as a part of my medical billing course. I began to think about healthy choices. Speaking with multiple dietitians, the focus was on meats and dairies and on the account of low iron, green leafy vegetables. Fast forwarding I was setting up my father's eulogy while comforting my mother through dates, cremation and family organizing. The thing about my father dying was that it was hours from my birthday. It would be an event I would remember the rest of my life and would be the changing point of all future decisions. My father was the foundation to our lives. In many ways, he set the tempo for living and what was living well. Living well for the "Owens's" was to travel, spend time with family and eating. Eating was a celebration ALWAYS. and never were there insecurities. We were all big and eating good. All that eating good had blown me to a whopping 325 pounds before I was 30 years old. And I wore it well. I was a curvy woman like the women before me. The small waist, ample boobs and hips galore. I never NOT felt beautiful. My parents daily reminders of being beautiful from the inside and out with an extra measure of grace. I was groomed for social atmospheres, to see to smile, to be of social service. In fact I was a plus size model, online entertainer and positive body image spokes person. This is not the story of how I found my inner skinny girl. This is my I will be damned to die story.
While my father was alive mom, my ex-husband and I took turns being his care giver. A man at his highest was well over 500 lbs. bed ridden and only able to get out of the bed with a Hoyer lift. The very practice that would start my inflammation. I, a few years prior to my "work related" injury decided I wanted to go to a gym with a friend. we knew we were big and we knew we needed to lose weight... One yoga visit, totally changed my perspective on the practice, my own body, and what my body could be capable of. Armed with a new exercise and love of nature I got busy. I walked I stretched and walked further. I would not put anything in my mouth unless it was the weight watcher’s smart choices. I was counting my calories. Although was I was hurt hospitalized and started my journey to an opioid addition. was not the choice for me? Some of the 100 pounds ballooned back on my body, moving was pure hell. Disk degeneration, bulging disk stenosis failed laminectomy, and burning sciatic butt and leg pain, would be the start of taking pain killers, muscle relaxers, anti-inflammatory medications. And I was talking my meds like candy. Soon I was suffering with insomnia. I was taking ambient, morphine and so on and so on. If you have taken medication or just have a television. you know there are side effects to theses prescribed pills. And the laundry list of side effects is long and could mimic other conditions or should I say mask other conditions. Needless to say, as soon as you tell your doctor about the side effects, welcome to more medications. And this would be the cycle I’d continued until I was taking 22 different medications. I was treating hormone issues. sciatica, pain, epilepsy, blood clots, sleep apnea, excessive pressure and fluid on the brain, emotional issues, depression, anxiety, memory loss, signs of diabetes and high blood pressure, by now I had been told on more than one occasions to make arrangements for my children. I had suffered MRSA, I had flat lined during labor and deliver. I was suffering serious migraines, horrible menstruations... I was suffering and the worst part is. I was excepting it as the way things happen. Cause and effect correct?
Well this was true and not so true. You see this world as we see it, is full of false truths. Meat and animal products were not contributing to my health. It was actually contributing to my illness. The bucket of pills was killing me the diet was killing me also. I went to the internet, I started back yoga from a few YouTubers. My parents were big on eating well, and they were huge on supplements. I knew a few names of some good herbs but what I was going to discover next would absolutely blow my mind. The studying began and I started buying herbs I had read about, experimentations, etc. St. John's Wort. hmm ok I do feel better but not ready to replace any medications. I dug deeper and deeper and before long I was drinking smoothies every morning filled with herbs, FO-TI, Reishi mushroom, spirulina, Moringa, and more. I started reading about pain and inflammation and as I changed my diet to anti-inflammation I started ditches carbs, pastas, most rice, etc. I walked away from red meats then progressively to no meat products at all. My mind was clearer. I was still taking a box of medication. Yet I knew I was on to something. I needed to stay in compliance with my doctors and I was advised I needed to lose weight and loose it fast. I went thought the year process of prepping for weight loss surgery. I met my weight goals with my vegan lifestyle. After surgery, I was teamed with a new list of bullshit. I was not going to lose a heap of weight without a cost. Weight loss surgery was the thing I feared before and afterwards. I contracted an infection, my left lung filled with fluid, I was drowning in my own fluids. I was having seizures more often and most importantly, I was failing to thrive I was not eating I was not able to keep anything down. I was suffering malnutrition.
A month and a half out I was dying and I was slipping away from me. I was tied. I lost a quick 50 pounds but I was far from healthy, in fact I was starting to gain weight. After sitting in the same hospital for over a month I was pissed yet I was determined and I was reading. I called my boyfriend I asked him to bring me a list of things... I cleaned my hospital room sagged and set up my crystals, I said a prayer set my intensions and I shut my door. I changed my whole thinking that day. I decided to live I decided to manifest more energy. I never wanted to feel "dying" again. I left there and never looked back I decided not to listen to the dieticians. I chose plant based diet and I chose my herbs. A year later, I will always regret the surgery due to my terror, the methods and processes I took to get here I put into motion prior to going under the knife. YET it was despite that fucking procedure I fought like hell to live. A year later I can jog a bit. a cane is not going to be in my future. today I hike I am back to camping today I am not skinny to, nor am I fat today I am healthy and that is living. My weight check in is November 25, 2019. today I am 178lbs. Today I start my weight training. My goals... I am training for strength. I am eating for health for longevity I am fighting to live 120 years. (Ask me about the book) That being said everything happens in its divine time and reason. I needed to be taken to total discomfort to learn how to let go, live and love every breath I take. I went back to school and became certified in holistic pain management, Ayurveda practices, traditional Chinese medicine. I went from sick, fired from my job. To launching my own holistic healing practice. I became certified and licensed as Reiki practitioner under pastoral medicine.
My journey inwards would be why I will remain a vegan. Once a person clears their mind and come to a place of “no mind” this is where so many answers for me lay. The symphony of truth lay right in the nothingness. I began to manifest. From the introduction of the process I was excited. I manifested everything and not one real thing at all. Only as I became more focused did I realize that some of my behaviors were not in line with my core needs. I wanted a certain ethical treatment from the universe I had not yet provided. Studying and taking the trip inward I was no longer a vegan for my dietary goals. I was a vegan for the ethical treatment of animals and the total consumption machine I believed I was entitled to be. The arrogance of it all really turned my stomach. After all the fighting for my life I had done, and I still suffered the delusion that “We” humans should be entitled. When I stripped that entitlement away I found that I need not participate in the cruelty of an animal to get any of my needs met. In fact, cutting out the meat cut out the “energy” middle man. Vegan friendly products became my new lifestyle. The choice to do so has enriched my relationship with animals, people and plants as well as the karmatic order.
While my father was alive mom, my ex-husband and I took turns being his care giver. A man at his highest was well over 500 pound, bed ridden and only able to get out of the bed with a Hoyer lift. The very practice that would start my inflammation. I a few years prior to my "work related" injury decided I wanted to go to a gym with a friend. we knew we were big and we knew we needed to lose weight... One yoga visit, totally changed my perspective on the practice my own body had not known what it could be capable of. Armed with a new exercise and love of nature I got busy. I walked I stretched and walked further. I would not put anything in my mouth unless it was the weight watcher’s smart choices. I was counting my calories. Although was I was hurt hospitalized and started my journey to an opioid addition. was not the choice for me? Some of the 100 pounds ballooned back on my body, moving was pure hell. Disk degeneration, bulging disk stenosis failed laminectomy, and burning sciatic butt and leg pain, would be the start of taking pain killers, muscle relaxers, anti-inflammatory medications. And I was talking my meds like candy. Soon I was suffering with insomnia. I was taking ambient, morphine and so on and so on. If you have taken medication or just have a television. you know there are side effects to theses prescribed pills. And the laundry list of side effects is long and could mimic other conditions or should I say mask other conditions. Needless to say, as soon as you tell your doctor about the side effects, welcome to more medications. and this cycle continued until I was taking 22 medications. I was treating hormone issues. sciatica, pain, epilepsy, blood clots, sleep apnea, excessive pressure and fluid on the brain, emotional issues, depression, anxiety, memory loss, signs of diabetes and high blood pressure, by now I had been told on more than one occasions to make arrangements for my children. I had suffered MRSA, I had flat lined during labor and deliver. I was suffering serious migraines, horrible menstruations... I was suffering and the worst part is. I was excepting it as the way things happen. Cause and effect correct? Well this was true and not so true. You see this world as we see it, is full of false truths. Meat and animal products were not contributing to my health. It was actually contributing to my illness. The bucket of pills was killing me the diet was killing me. I went to the internet, I started back yoga from a few YouTubers. My parents were big on eating well, and they were huge on supplements. I knew a few names of some good herbs but what I was going to discover next would absolutely blow my mind. The studying began and I started buying herbs I had read about, experimentations, etc. St. John's Wort. hmm ok I do feel better but not ready to replace any medications. I dug deeper and deeper and before long I was drinking smoothies every morning filled with herbs, FO-TI, Reishi mushroom, spirulina, Moringa, and more. I started reading about pain and inflammation and as I changed my diet to anti-inflammation I started ditches carbs, pastas, most rice, etc. I walked away from red meats then progressively to no meat products at all. My mind was clearer. I was still taking a box of medication. Yet I knew I was on to something. I needed to stay in compliance with my doctors and I was advised I needed to lose weight and loose it fast. Reluctant, I remember how my father didn't even qualify for any type of weight loss procedure. But if he had, would he be alive, or would the complications had killed him. I 'll never know so this would be me facing a fear not even offered to some. Might as well take advantage. Besides no surgeon was willing to try any further back procedures until the weight was mostly gone. I went thought the year process of prepping for weight loss surgery. I met my weight goals with my vegan lifestyle. After surgery, I was teamed with a new list of bullshit. I was not going to lose a heap of weight without a cost. Weight loss surgery was the thing I feared before and afterwards. I contracted an infection, my left lung filled with fluid, I was drowning in my own fluids. I was having seizures more often and most importantly, I was failing to thrive I was not eating I was not able to keep anything down. I was suffering malnutrition.
A month and a half out I was dying and I was slipping away from me. I was tied. I lost a quick 30 pounds but I was far from healthy. After sitting in the same hospital for over a month I was pissed yet I was determined and I was reading. I called my boyfriend I asked him to bring me a list of things... I cleaned my hospital room sagged and set up my crystals, I said a prayer set my intensions and I shut my door. I changed my whole thinking that day. I decided to live I decided to manifest more energy. I never wanted to feel "dying" again. I left there and never looked back I decided not to listen to the dieticians. I chose plant based and I chose my herbs. A year later, I will always regret the surgery, the methods and processes I took to get here I put into motion prior to going under. YET it was despite that fucking procedure I fought like hell to live. A year later I can job a bit. a cane is not going to be in my future. today I hike I am back to camping today I am not skinny to, nor am I fat today I am healthy and that is living. My weight check in is November 25, 2019. today I am 178 pounds. Today I start my weight training. My goals... I am training for strength. I am eating for health for longevity I am fighting to live 120 years. (Ask me about the book) I am training for the 10 mile hike down into the Grand Canyon. I look forward to my 3 day adventure vacation I will owe myself. That being said everything happens in its divine time and reason. I needed to be taken to a place of total discomfort to learn how to let go live and love every breath I take.
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Love and Life Mika